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Credits
For Annelies Tillemans.
Composition completed march 2005.
Recording released april 2005.
Composed, arranged, produced and performed by Gerard Slooven.
Song
January 8th, 2005 I heard the terrible news that my eldest sister, at the age of 50, was diagnosed with terminal cancer. In the following weeks I got the idea to write an instrumental guitar piece for her. Of all my songs, this one was one of the hardest to write. It started out as a very depressed and dark composition, but evolved into an atmospheric, peaceful and calming piece. I really tried to celebrate her life and not the pain concerning her illness. I had a difficult time deciding which guitar was suited the composition best. It turned out to be my spanish guitar, although the baby Taylor also makes it sound beautiful. Somehow this piece doesn't work that good on full-size steelstring guitars.
Writing it was very painful, some parts of the song made me cry every time I played them. This initially upset me, but then I thought that at least it evoked an emotion, so I should be on the right track. Most of this emotional response disappeared when the composition was finished. As if the song was comforting me from that moment on.
I had told my sister that I was writing a song for her, and she was very excited about that. But playing it for her was too difficult for me... So I promised her that I would record it and send it to her. I also thought that it would be very difficult for her to listen to it for the first time. After all, the initial reason why I had decided to write it was not a happy one. And some things are better done in private.
Recording
Track length: [03:02].
Instrument: Da Montagne spanish guitar.
Recording this piece was a very strange experience.
One day at work (which later turned out to be only a week before Annelies died) I got very restless and constantly thought about recording the composition. It was not a negative emotion, I just got really excited about recording it. So, on my way home in the car, I planned the evening: first make some dinner, than set up the hardware in the studio, watch some TV, and then calmly record it. It turned out to go very different. I got home, threw my coat and bag on a chair in the living room, walked into the studio, turned on the hard disk recorder, plugged in the microphone, and, without finetuning anything, played the song three times on my Da Montagne Spanish guitar. And literally 9 minutes later I had it nailed. When the song was finished, I sat in my studio chair, shaking uncontrollably. At first I felt drained, but that was soon replaced by feeling very energetic and happy. Later that evening I mixed and mastered the track, and send my sister the mp3 of the recording.
What I didn't know was that her condition had gotten so bad during the previous days, that it wasn't even sure if she would ever hear the song. But fortunately she and her husband listened to it three days later. Apparently she liked it very much, because she kept saying so when she heard it, even though at that time she was feeling too tired to even speak most of the time.
I cannot say how much that meant to me at that time, and still means to me today.
Image
Annelies loved photography. Wherever she went, her camera went with her. She specialised in concert and nature photography. This photo of a vase with flower was made by her. She also added some digital effects to the image.
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